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June 8, 2022

Dating South Korean Men Showed Me I Have to Be Free. from Myself

Some guys I knew loved hanging out with girls whom they called cool and funny – for example, girls who could drink two bottles of soju straight

I see myself as a lively, bright and sociable girl. I love to interact with new people and have no problem making new friends. I’m not exactly quiet, and I’m definitely not the ‘submissive girl’ that many people see South Korean girls as.

There’s nothing wrong with who I am. But somehow, my personality became a problem when I started dating men in South Korea at the age of 20.

A bunch of my girlfriends had similar worries when dating South Korean men

But sooner or later, they started to complain about things that energize my life, what I think are important, like interacting with people and having fun at interesting social gatherings. Here are some things I heard from my ex’s:

I was confused. I thought, is my outgoing personality – which was attractive to them in the beginning – an obstacle to developing a stable relationship?

I soon found out that I was not alone. The biggest source of complaint was the irony of men applying different standards on their female friends and “my girlfriend.”

But the same guys would get angry when their own girlfriends tried to drink more than one can of beer. They wanted to date a girl who was smart and independent enough to handle her own life, but also dependent enough to respect their choices, rely on them to make decisions, and get advice from them when faced with difficulties.

You can see this contradictory expectation in female heroines of many K-dramas. The beautiful female protagonist is independent and savvy at her office, but in front of a guy she likes, she’s one step behind, submissive and gentle. She should be resilient but needs to be rescued when hardship arises.

December 30, 2021

She informs a€?As a female, in the event you you need to put that youre over 30, lads imagine the neurological clock are ticking a€“ these people believe youre needy!

a€?But my personal goals are more very similar to the ones from a 25-27 yr old. I do not decide a household a€“ i simply wish evening and have a great time.

Initially, Annas modified online dating years was actually a major accident. She claims: a€?When I signed up with fb we didnt wish to use my true big date of delivery, thus I add a special season. When we went on Tinder for the first time, we learn that we emerged as 5yrs more youthful.

a€?I preferred they and chosen to ensure that is stays that way because I sensed it absolutely was a accommodate based on how Im emotionally, physically, plus when it comes to what Im after.

That was six in years past, and because subsequently Annas outdated about 50 guys, each of whom believed she was actually 5 years more youthful a€“ although she didnt you can keep them at midnight for long, usually disclosing the real generation on earliest or secondly time.

Anna talks about: a€?I just now would like them in order to satisfy me personally in real life. I am very happy to let them know your get older whenever we see directly because thats therefore not like viewing lots on a dating member profile and instantly getting expectations.

Maybe because Annas footage are generally updated, she hasnt had any negative reactions asian hookup app free. a€?whenever I inform them the facts, they state, oh well, a person do not have a look it!a€?, Anna points out. a€?But whether thats genuine or not, I do not learn.

Annas perfect dude try 27, although case meeting folks between 22 and 32.